Learning to Thrive Under Stress

Image Credit: George Dagerotip for Unsplash

The formation of diamonds is all about stress. They are formed when carbon atoms deep in the Earth’s crust face conditions of intense heat and pressure. This causes the atoms to crystalize into the baubles that grace our fingers, ears and necks.

The carbon matter that forms diamonds is simple. In its original form it looks like dust or black rock, but with extreme pressure, voilà, it turns into something that is beautiful beyond measure. 

In the human world, we usually don’t view stress as something that provides a fabulous result. In fact, research shows that increased tension can wreak havoc on our entire system. It has been connected to cardiovascular, gastrointestinal and cognitive disease.

So, it would be easy to believe that we humans should avoid all stress.

But that is in fact, not the case. There is well documented research that shows that stress can be something powerfully positive in our lives. There are of course tipping points. Too much of it and we do break down. However, it can be channeled into making us more resilient and confident. 

Achieving this outcome begins with mindset. The way we perceive pressure can actually be harnessed to build us up. It can transform stress from something to avoid into a force that drives positive growth and change. 

Dr. Alia Crum researches how our beliefs and attitudes about stress influences its effects. Most people come from a stress is debilitating mindset. This is what common knowledge seems to tell us. Stress is harmful and something to be circumvented. When we adopt this paradigm, it impairs our ability to react which, in turn, increases the pressure. The result: We feel debilitated and powerless which of course does not help build self confidence in handling the world around us.

Dr. Crum found that there is another way to look at things that can lead to more adaptive responses. It is adopting a stress is enhancing mindset. This approach allows us to view stress as something that is a natural part of the human experience. It is something that we should expect and is actionable. This leads to a more muted physiological reaction, allowing our brain to function more effectively leading to more successful resolution of pressurized situations. This creates an energized feedback loop where our confidence shines.   

Studies have measured the physical benefits of a stress is enhancing mindset. One study found that people who adopted this way of looking at the world had increased growth hormones, more positive affect, and greater cognitive flexibility than those with a stress is debilitating mindset.

When we are presented with a difficult situation, the first thing our brain does is evaluate it. This allows us to focus our emotional and physical resources on the situation. People who believe stress is a potential for growth view the situation as a challenge. They believe they possess the ability to address. It may be unpleasant, but they have confidence they can figure it out and move through it.   

On the other side of the coin, those that believe that a stressful situation is depleting will see it as a threat. They become scared and these feelings of fear make them believe that they do not have the resources or ability to handle the event. 

It is easy to see how this difference in perception would alter the reaction of our bodily systems. A threat takes much more of a toll on us physically and psychologically. Learning to reframe stress induced arousal is key to adopting the stress is enhancing mindset. And the proof is in the research. People who are able to do this show more adaptive cardiovascular responses, better performance, and more effective coping.

A stress is enhancing mindset allows you to feel energized, focused, and motivated in the face of a challenge. Here are some steps to nurture this approach:

1.    Reframe Your Perspective. Reframing is key. Think of a painting. The frame of a painting can significantly influence your view of the work. A thick gilded frame might make a renaissance work pop, where it would overwhelm a simplistic modern piece. It is the same with our mind. We frame things all of the time. For example, thinking about the fun you will have on a trip frames the experience in a positive way. Developing these types of frames is our superpower. In the case of stress, framing the episode as “This is a challenge I can rise to” has a direct impact on how your body and mind will respond.

2.    Focus on What You Can Control. Try an experiment. Think of a stressful situation in your life. Focus on all of the uncontrollable elements in the scenario. We are sure that your heart is racing a bit more rapidly. Now, think about some things that are in your control. You have focused your brain on a task it can complete. This will start to calm your nerves. Identifying actionable steps channels stress into productive energy instead of anxiety. 

3.    Practice Positive Self-Talk. Think of that children’s story, The Little Engine that Could. The Engine kept saying, “I think I can, I think I can”, until it was able to traverse, what everyone thought, was an impossible hill to climb. We can replace our fear-based thoughts (“I can’t handle this”) with empowering statements (“I have the resources to manage this”).

4.    Use Stress as a Signal to Prepare. This is a cousin of reframing. Think of how you feel when you are really excited about something? Your heart races, you think about it constantly and you may even get a little light headed. How do you encode these sensations? Do you see them as debilitating? No, you feel energized and you can’t wait for the result. In stressful situations being able to interpret the physiological signs of stress (racing heart, tension) as your body gearing up to perform is key. When that perspective is combined with deep breathing or other grounding techniques the result is an improved ability to handle whatever comes.

5.    Reflect and Learn. Stress can highlight opportunities for skill-building and personal growth. Ask yourself, “What did I learn from this situation that I can use to grow?  What strategies worked and what didn’t?” Over time, reflecting and integrating new skills builds confidence in your ability to effectively handle future scenarios.

Assessing and adjusting mindsets is a life-long process. Taking time to reflect, identifying necessary mindset shifts and putting them into action takes practice. The steps we have outlined can help you transform stress from something to fear into the very force that helps you sparkle, just like a diamond.